by Martha Tobin
Six years ago my mom and my youngest brother died twelve days apart and my world fell apart. In quick succession we then had to empty and sell my mom’s home and empty my brother’s apartment.
I ended up with a lot of items that fell under the heading of ‘memorabilia’. For a few months these items sat in a pile in the middle of our living room as I didn’t have the emotional strength to tackle it.
When I did start to go through these items, it was a sad but beautiful experience that made me realize that while I had kept some of these items more out of grief than memory; other items conjured up vivid, powerful memories.
Here are the determining factors regarding memorabilia that I kept (and you may find helpful):
- Does it conjure up a good memory? (i.e. photos)
- Would it be something I would want to display in our home? (i.e. painting)
- Is it something I would wear or use? (i.e. recipes)
- Is it something that I can store but access easily? (i.e. letters)
- Is it relevant generational information for our children? (i.e. old passports)
In the end, I kept some photos, letters, handwritten recipes, a few clothes, a recording of their voices, some paintings etc. And I have found sacred spots for these to ‘live’ in our home.
There is nothing that will ever replace the loss of a loved one but having their energy around you in the form of memories that you can glance over at will bring you joy.
At the end of any decluttering journey there is always a ‘lightness’ that makes life more hopeful and encourages self-awareness so that you can move forward with your plans and dreams.
Keep your treasures….better yet, find them a place to live in your home where they can be enjoyed everyday.